How to Manage Team Conflict

Ever dream of going to work to collaborate with a team on which nobody disagreed, opinions and egos never clashed, and harmony reigned supreme?

The lessons taught in Villanova University’s online course Maximizing Team Effectiveness suggest you should be careful what you wish for.

“No conflict, no change, no innovation,” teaches the course, which is a requirement in Villanova’s Certificate in Organizational Leadership program.  

Martin Boyle, DM, MBA, concurs. Dr. Boyle is one of the instructors for the Maximizing Team Effectiveness course and he also teaches Advanced Contract Management.

“Avoiding it does not make it better,” Dr. Boyle said of conflict. “Sometimes it festers.”

Manage, Don’t Eliminate

The Maximizing Team Effectiveness course teaches that conflict is something a team leader has to manage, but not eliminate.

Dr. Boyle, who worked in the security field for years before entering academia, recommends team leaders use author Tom Rath’s “StrengthsFinder 2.0” in the early stages of putting together a team.

The book, Dr. Boyle said, includes a test that “breaks down attributes and breaks down traits” to show “what our pursuits are and what makes us happy,” he said. The point wasn’t to fill the team with people having similar traits. In fact, it was the opposite.

“If you get too many people who think the same in the same room, you may not be able to expand,” he said. “You’ve got to think outside the box.”

As a team leader, you will be dealing with personalities and egos, Dr. Boyle said. Those egos often create the team’s first conflicts as its lineup takes shape.

I Should Be in Charge Because …

Dr. Boyle said there are several reasons why team members think they should be the leader. He identified four common themes:

• I should be in charge because I’m the oldest
• I should be in charge because I’m here longest
• I should be in charge because I have greater knowledge of the subject matter
• I just came in from the outside and I know I’ve only been here six months, but I have a better feel for the customers than you do

“Everybody’s got a reason to try to reach for the top of the pinnacle,” he said.

Deciding who will be in charge of the team or its project can become a conflict when egos are involved, as in the example above. It may seem like the ideal spot for the team leader to assert their authority to bring about a resolution.

However, if the parties in conflict don’t want an intermediary, the leader’s efforts might be fruitless or even harmful.

As taught in the Maximizing Team Effectiveness course, “You cannot resolve a conflict between two people who don’t want to get over it. You can only help them resolve a conflict if they let you.”

If the leader hasn’t been asked to intervene, they should avoid jumping into the fray, taking sides or offering suggestions. Once asked, though, or if the parties in conflict reach an impasse, the leader has the opportunity to help reach a resolution.

Clarify the Issue, Follow the Ground Rules

The Maximizing Team Effectiveness course recommends that the leader should first clarify what the current conflict is, especially if the parties have a history of disagreements concerning work. “The actual issue is the last thing they’ll talk about.”

The course identifies five ground rules for the team leader to follow when attempting to resolve a conflict. 

1. Attack the problem, not the person
2. Use “I,” not “you”
3. Ask for or offer to help
4. Seek to understand why this situation is occurring
5. Try to find a win-win solution

The leader must be respectful toward both sides of the conflict and must ensure that their team is as well, Dr. Boyle said.

“You’ve got to get around things like ‘No comments’ or “My way or the highway,’” Dr. Boyle continued. “No insults. Don’t be defensive, and no verbal threats or ultimatums with regard to emails. Don’t beat around the bush. If you’ve got a question, bring it up. Avoidance kicks the can further down the road, and sometimes you’ve got to hit it head-on.”

Respect for Teammates

Furthermore, Dr. Boyle said, it’s vital to maintain respect for team members, even if they seem overly assertive or reticent.

One team member may try to take on all or most of the tasks. “It’s the old ‘if you want it done right, do it yourself’ sort of thing,” he said. “It’s not that they want the recognition. They’ll give the recognition to everyone else on the team, but they want it done once, they want it done right, they want it done professionally, and they want to make sure that at the end the whole team is looked at positively and not negatively.”

Conversely, Dr. Boyle recommends that leaders don’t assume team members who don’t speak up are trying to shirk assignments.

“I don’t want individuals to look at the quiet people on the team and assume that they are lazy or they don’t want to do the work,” he said. “Again, I believe it’s about individuals being shy, and it’s about a realization about looking inward.”

“You’re supposed to hear everybody out. Everybody has a right to be in that room and everybody has an opinion,” Dr. Boyle added. “Not everybody’s right and not everybody’s wrong. It’s like a melding of the minds to come up with a solution. If you focus on what you need to achieve first and not make it about the people in the room, many times you’ll get buy in.”